Can you believe it?  Christmas is next week already.  And, so far no snow.  I’m looking forward to some time off work. I will be off starting the 24^th and don’t have to return until January 4.

I’m still struggling with being at work. Some friends have suggested that I get a different job.  In all honesty, the vacation is what keeps me working here.  I have been here 26 years now and I have 6 weeks of vacation to use in a year’s time.  I wouldn’t be able to find a new job that would give me that kind of vacation right away.  I can’t see me going back to only one or two weeks.  My job is also not terribly far from home.  So what’s my problem!?  What I keep telling myself each morning is that it could be worse.  I could be back in that hospital again. Lord knows I don’t want to go back there again.

On to another subject, tomorrow is my 6 year weight loss surgery anniversary.  I had the gastric sleeve done 12/15/09.  I continue to struggle with my weight.  I had gotten to a low of 253. Now I’m up to 310. Yes, I had some regain, actually quite a lot.  My health insurance pays for my husband and me to go to Weight Watchers so that’s good.  We weigh in on Saturday mornings.  My last weigh in, I had gained 1 lb.   I didn’t get upset about it. Prior to that I had been slowly losing each week.  I rarely feel hungry. I eat because I know I need the nutrition.

So back to Christmas, I imagine many already have their shopping done.  Not us! I have no idea what to get my two adult kids. It was so much easier when they were young.  Some days I miss them as young kids.  But there are other times that I’m glad their adults. Like when I was hospitalized. There’s times when my husband and I will go shopping or get invited somewhere and we witness some other couples young kids and how loud and obnoxious they are.  And I think, boy I’m glad our kids are adults.  I hope to have grandkids someday.  My oldest is still going to school and she isn’t married yet, but she does have a nice man in her life. It is my hope that they’ll have kids someday.  My youngest has voiced she doesn’t want kids.

For newbies to my blog, I have been hospitalized more than once for mental issues.  They finally found the right med combination so I have been doing well. I still get to feeling down or I get some anxiety. But nothing compared to how it was during hospitalization.  I take Cymbalta, Haldol, Benztoprine to help with some side effects I was having with the Haldol, and lastly Trazodone for sleep. I used to hate taking any kind of meds, but now I’m more than willing because I don’t want to be like I was.  I was far from myself.

With that, I’ll bring this blog post to a close.

Peace – Love – Smiles